r.i.p. to my forever home

I was 9 months pregnant and feeling every sweaty step as I approached the front door. When I woke up that morning, I had no idea that an effort to humor my husband in checking out an open house “for fun” would result in us finding it: our forever home!

I fell in love with the house before the home tour was over. It was a fixer upper with good bones, lots of dreamy natural light – and to put icing on the cake – it was a huge bargain in our dream neighborhood! We’d always known that our next house would potentially be our forever home, but we never dreamed we’d find it so soon!

We immediately put an offer on the house, closed on it the day after I gave birth, and moved in two-weeks postpartum. The plan was to begin renovations weeks after moving in, but those weeks turned into months. I grew impatient.

I’d be nursing with nothing better to do than stare at the walls. That’s when the discontent would start to sneak in. I’d criticize and complain over every imperfection of the home. I made an inventory list of every little change I wanted to make – nothing was negotiable. It’d just have to fit into the budget.

When the renovation-monster began rearing it’s ugly head on my family, I realized that I needed to do a heart check. I asked myself:

What if I got everything I wanted?

What if my Pinterest board dreams were executed to a T and my home became the envy of Instagram?

Would that make my family happier? Healthier?

Would I be a better wife/mom/homemaker?

Would my “forever home” satisfy me forever?

Would I somehow be closer with God?

The answer to that last question was an obvious and resounding “NO.” In fact my obsession with  my earthly dwelling was actually driving me from the presence of my Savior.

God’s Word is full of wisdom and exhortation against trusting in wealth and possessions, but the verse that speaks to my heart is actually from a passage about worry:

Fear not little flock, for it is your Father’s good pleasure to give you the kingdom.

Luke 12:32

All the temporary things in the world can’t satisfy me like the one person I can never lose – Christ!  His kingdom – his presence, his power, his work – are the only things that matter! One day we might move or lose our house to an unfortunate circumstance. But my eternal home is unshakeable.

When my priorities are properly in submission to Christ, I’m set free from the influence of the renovation-monster. A heavenly perspective also helps me to realize that it’s ok to be excited about the remodel. If used correctly, our home can be an effective tool in kingdom work.

I love this quote from Gloria Furman’s book, Missional Motherhood:

“We leverage our homes for gospel work. For those whose hope is in the coming kingdom, our homes are less like treats and more like a network of foxholes for planning and hosting kingdom advances into this present darkness. Our homes are centers of hospitality to show strangers and neighbors the light of Christ. And they are equipping centers for traveling ambassadors to help them on their way to doing the King’s business”.

When my heart and hopes are set on Christ, I count my material blessings for what they are – gifts given for accomplishing kingdom purposes. And in that proper light I can enjoy my home to the fullest – it won’t own me.

I look forward to raising our family within these walls. I can see gospel-conversations around the kitchen table, teaching our kids to read from their bibles, hosting studies, and helping to mend broken hearts with true comfort from the seats of our comfy couch.

I still have high hopes that we’ll live in this house for many years. But the term “forever home” is hilariously relative in light of eternity.

So I’m officially retiring the phrase until I reach my true Forever Home.

 

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roots and wings: a name change + a new direction

roots + wings

If this isn’t your first time on the blog today, you might notice some changes around here.

Roots and Wings – what’s that?

Recently I’ve been doing lots of praying and heart searching with regards to this online platform. Why do I blog? Who do I blog for?

I started blogging before I understood it was “a thing”. I showed up late to the blogging party and was completely clueless to how popular it had become. My love for writing, desire to explore something creative, and share my husband and I’s travels launched me on a journey I never would have imagined myself on.

About six months in, I began hearing the phrases “influencer” and “life style blog” for the first time. Suddenly, I felt this internal pressure to be the influential lifestyle blogger – an expert in all things: makeup, style, homemaking, travel, photography, brand marketing, and child-rearing! And since I am an expert in NONE of those things, I clammed up and stopped writing altogether.

While there’s nothing wrong with any of those interests or blogs (I’m a frequent consumer of them) the Lord faithfully showed me the reason those topics felt forced.

Those topics are not my passion. I could never write about them in my authentic voice. And in a culture in which we are constantly tempted to define ourselves by what we do and own, I felt all the more convicted that my writing was moving far from the mark of pleasing my Maker.

I’ve come to realize that the “realest” writing I can produce won’t come from the perspective of an expert, but from the very opposite: a humble mom claiming all dependency on her mighty Savior.

So now (for as long as I am led) this blog will serve as a journal of sorts. The name Roots and Wings is a phrase that actually came out of my old-fashioned paper-bound journal! While pregnant with my daughter Everly, I wrote a prayer asking that the Lord would give her both roots and wings.

Roots: I prayed Ephesians 3:17 over her, that Christ would dwell in her heart through faith and that she would be rooted and grounded in love and come to comprehend the length, width, height and depth of God’s love for her.

Wings: I prayed that she would live untethered to this world, living instead at the pleasure of the King and his heavenly kingdom. It’s my hope and prayer that she will fly free and exercise God’s unique gifts of grace wherever He may lead her (even if that’s one day away from mom)!

This blog is a space where I can share my own practice of roots and wings. I’ll never be an expert, but I hope that in sharing my journey in grace I can point people to the Only One. Because he is completely worthy of all of the praise!

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Camping with an 8 month old

camping with an 8 month oldcamping with an 8 month oldcamping with an 8 month oldcamping with an 8 month oldcamping with an 8 month oldcamping with an 8 month old

Last month we took Everly on her second big adventure…camping in Havasupai Falls! While camping down in the Grand Canyon with an 8 month old may seem overly ambitious to some, it’s an inevitable rite of passage for the Bennett family. We take groups of people to Supai on guided tours as a side biz and we went down last year while Everly was 5 months old on the inside!

This trip was also a really important heart check for me. Although we enjoyed Everly’s first adventure to Mexico at 5 months, I found myself too often mourning the change of pace that came with traveling with a baby.

So approaching this camping trip I let go of all expectations. Not in a pesimistic sense, but one open-handed to whatever new blessings the Lord had in store for our adventuring family.

True to his gracious character, God far exceeded whatever shallow expectations I had in mind!

Everly slept!

Mom slept! (Can I get a hallelujah!)

Everly ate on schedule and even experimented with new foods!

We got over 6 miles of hiking in with Everly asleep on Mike’s back.

And I got to explore a part of the canyon I hadn’t in over four years!

Tips and Tricks

With only 1 camping trip under our belts, we are by no means experts, but the things that worked for us we are more than happy to pass on!

  1. Get Osprey Child Carrier Pack. We were fortunate enough to be able to borrow one from friends and now we’ll definitely be getting one of our own! It was light weight and had an optional sun-shade  built into it – which was a must!
  2. Wear your babe. The Osprey pack worked great while hiking, but this ring sling is my at-all-times-go-to for wearing Everly. She feels safe exploring with me in the sling and it’s a great way to soothe her to sleep when it’s nap-time and we’re on the go.
  3. Dock your tot. I held out until this camping trip to get a Dock-a-Tot, and I probably won’t use it again until the next kid since Everly’s nearly out-grown it. But it worked great for this trip since Everly couldn’t fit in our sleeping bag with us and we didn’t want to lug around a pack-and-play just for night-time. Even though she’s typically a stomach sleeper, she slept soundly tucked into the Dock-a-Tot.
  4. Bundle up your babe. Did you know they make sleeping bags for babies!? I didn’t. But they’re adorable and a must for camping. I ended up getting this footmuff instead of an actual sleeping bag because it can be fastened into a stroller as well.
  5. Pack a play space. Everly was in the put-any-and-all-objects into my mouth stage during this trip, so giving her free range in the dirt wasn’t an option. We picked up a water-proof picnic blanket from Costco and it was a life-saver! It’s easy to clean, light weight, and it folds up small enough to carry in a pack. Here’s a similar one.
  6. Travel with Grandparents. This tip is the one most key to the trip’s success! Having my parents along on the trip was an enormous blessing – for everyone. 🙂

camping with an 8 month old

Any experienced camping mama’s out there have more tips to share? I’d love to hear!

 

 

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Life with a Newborn + 7 Somethings

This week’s edition of 7 somethings is dedicated to our sweet newborn and seven somethings I’ve realized since bringing her home!

Life with a Newborn + 7 Somethings

We took these photos with the talented Kourtney Marie just ten days after Everly was born. I CANNOT believe the difference two and a half months have made in my baby (cue mom tears)!

Life with a Newborn + 7 SomethingsLife with a Newborn + 7 SomethingsLife with a Newborn + 7 SomethingsLife with a Newborn + 7 SomethingsLife with a Newborn + 7 SomethingsLife with a Newborn + 7 Somethings

Life with a Newborn + 7 Somethings

Life with a Newborn + 7 Somethings

  1. Remember when I said that I was looking forward to baby feet and hands? Yep – they’re absolutely delicious (I’ve learned that you can use “delicious” to describe a baby once you’ve had one. Just trust me… I’m not a cannibal).
  2. Newborn baby stretches + yawns might actually be cuter than baby feet and hands! I think they could melt the heart of worst villain. Basically, they’re super hero powers.
  3. Since having a baby of my own, I want to weep sappy tears whenever I see a baby in public! I have post-baby fever!
  4. When Everly finally opened up her fists, guess what I found inside? LINT! New mamas, consider this your PSA and check those baby rolls for lint! 😉
  5. My girl is EXPRESSIONATE! (She’s got her daddy’s brow to thank for that!) I love seeing what makes her curious and happy.
  6. Breast feeding is hard. No amount of studying or advice truly prepared me for how difficult it would be. And yet I don’t regret a minute of the struggle. The bond between Everly and I is so indescribably precious.
  7. Each day is a new adventure. I’ll think I’ve got nursing down or a nap time routine figured out, then the next day her poop is an entirely different color than the day before and my Adventureman has to hold be back from rushing her to the ER, “just in case”. I’m learning how deeply I need the moment-by-moment strength and peace of my Lord – and it’s a good thing.

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Defeating Mom Guilt

Last month we spent a weekend in La Jolla, California at the beautiful La Valencia Hotel. It was a refreshing weekend with family and friends, but at one point I had to combat a serious bout of mom guilt.

defeating mom guilt

defeating mom guiltdefeating mom guiltdefeating mom guiltdefeating mom guiltdefeating mom guilt

We were at a swanky seaside restaurant for dinner and were seated on the patio. My desert-dwelling self wasn’t prepared for the evening chill and I was agonizing over whether or not I had bundled Everly enough.

I ventured to the restroom hoping to find a changing table and a secluded place to nurse, but wouldn’t you know it – those things don’t exist in swanky restaurants! As I slid two chairs together into a makeshift changing table, I began to berate myself:

“I should’ve thought things through more before bringing Everly on this trip.”

“Who brings a two month old to a restaurant like this?!”

“Why didn’t I think to bring warmer clothes?!”

“Am I a bad mom? Or worse… do they think that I’m a bad mom?”

At that moment, an elderly woman entered the restroom and interrupted my thoughts. Seeing Everly brought a HUGE smile to her face. She came close to admire her and we exchanged a little small talk.

Then she let her guard down.

She told me how she regretted not having a child of her own. Instead of having children, she toured the world as a career ballerina performing in famous shows, including Swan Lake.

“Wow, that’s amazing!” I told her. “What an accomplishment!”

A look of sadness washed over her face as she replied, “I thought so at the time. But now look at me – I have nothing to show for it.”

My heart broke. Not only for the regret and pain I heard in her voice, but because I recognized in her my own need to seek out significance and worth in accolades.

In being the best mom, the best teacher, blogger, sister, etc. My list of identity-definers is limitless.

And so unsatisfying.

Each pursuit leaves me disappointed and empty because only one pursuit, one identity, can ever truly fulfill me.

And that is Christ.

He redeemed me when I was irredeemable. My life in him has purpose and meaning that extends beyond this present reality and into eternity. Motherhood fades, careers come and go, and trophies and accolades will burn up in the end – but my my status as a daughter of the King will never end.

So why do I strive for perfection in temporary titles? I think it will be my life-long struggle. But the fight to honor and love the Lord above all else is a worthy one.

Before I had time to process my thoughts into a meaningful response, the woman was gone and Everly and I were left alone in the bathroom. I deeply regret not being able to share the hope of the gospel with her!

My prayer is that by sharing this story, someone reading might be encouraged! This journey is nothing apart from Jesus. His grace and salvation are sufficient in this life and for all eternity!

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Dear Everly: A Birth Story

Dear Everly,

I’ve written so many letters to you, letters filled with prayers for your life and the excited ramblings of your expectant mama. But of all the letters I’ve written to you, this one is by far my favorite. It’s the story of how you came be with us – your birth story.

Dear Everly: A Birth Story

I had hoped that you’d come early, but you kept your mama in suspense and decided to wake me up early in the morning just two days before your due date! The pains began softly – almost so softly that I wasn’t certain if I was imagining them!

Your dad and I decided that it was best to hunker down and try to relax as much as possible until you arrived. Dad made some work calls from home and I tried to nap without much success. I was just too excited to meet you! We read our favorite verses aloud. My favorite was from Psalm 139:

For you (God) formed my inward parts; you knitted me together in my mother’s womb. I praise you for I am fearfully and wonderfully made.

I couldn’t wait for the unveiling of the beautiful work of art that the Lord had been knitting together inside of me for so many months!

Suddenly those soft pains began to pick up intensity. Short of eating ice cream, I knew the only thing that could make me feel better was a warm bubble bath! So in I went! While I soaked in the tub, your dad played our love song on the piano.

Dear Everly: A Birth Story

About that time, Doula Alyssa arrived. I don’t know what we would have done without her help! She rubbed my back and helped me to get into comfortable positions for each birth pain. When I was feeling weak and afraid, she encouraged me to be strong and remember that with each breath and pain, we were getting closer and closer to seeing your face.

Dear Everly: A Birth Story

Finally, at seven in the evening, we decided that you were DEFINITELY on your way and it was time to get to the hospital. I’ve never seen your dad get out the door so quickly! Before I could even put on a change of clothes he had the car packed and ready. The sun was setting, but we could barely see it through the monsoon storm that blew in just in time to escort us to the hospital!

Dear Everly: A Birth Story

We hit nearly every red light along the way, but finally we arrived at the hospital. I waddled to the door where the amazing Doula Noleen had a wheelchair waiting for me. The nurses checked me and determined that on a scale from 1 to 10, my body was at an EIGHT! It was almost time to push!

I continued to labor in the hospital room. I was getting so tired! I remember thinking, “What if Everly doesn’t come out?!” To help speed up your exit and bring you earth side, the doctor broke my water. Now there was nothing standing in your way!

Dear Everly: A Birth Story

Through the hospital window, we saw fireworks – which was actually quite fitting because firework explosions are the only way I can think to characterize the feeling of pushing! The minutes dragged on for what felt like a painful eternity. But then suddenly – you were here!

Dear Everly: A Birth Story

They placed you in my arms and all I could do was look at you in complete shock and with absolute joy. You were here! After all the months of waiting, I was finally able to see your beautiful face.

Dear Everly: A Birth Story

Dear Everly: A Birth StoryDear Everly: A Birth StoryDear Everly: A Birth StoryDear Everly: A Birth StoryDear Everly: A Birth StoryDear Everly: A Birth StoryDear Everly: A Birth StoryDear Everly: A Birth Story

For so long I tried to anticipate how I would feel once I finally got to hold you in my arms. The love your dad and I have for you is SO much deeper than I ever could have imagined! It’s indescribable!

I pray for you everyday.

I pray that I can be every bit the mom you need me to be.

I pray that our love for you would lead you to the foot of the cross.

And I pray that your days would be full of the joy that comes from loving the Lord and serving others.

I can’t wait to watch you grow, dear daughter. Welcome home!

Love,

Mom

Incredible pictures taken by Alyssa and Noleen.

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Honey-Cucumber Lemonade: The Perfect Summertime Drink

Honey Cucumber Lemonade

If you’ve been following along, you know that I’ve been obsessed with lemonade ever since our babymoon to Hawaii! Not to mention that nothing says “summer” like a chilled glass of lemonade (especially when temperatures exceed 100 degrees here in Phoenix)!

Honey Cucumber Lemonade

I’ve been playing around with various lemonade recipes – doing some research and LOTS of trial and error. I’ve finally mastered a recipe that combines some of my all-time favorite flavors: honey, cucumber, and of course – lemon!

Honey Cucumber Lemonade

The honey-infusion in this recipe makes for the perfect pairing of sweet and tart that’s SO refreshing!

I hope this honey-cucumber lemonade helps to liven up your summer!

Print

Honey-Cucumber Lemonade

Course Drinks
Servings 6 cups

Ingredients

Lemonade

  • 2 cups fresh-squeezed lemon juice about 13-14 lemons
  • 1 cup sugar
  • 4 cups water
  • 1/2 cucumber to garnish

Honey-Cucumber Syrup

  • 1/4 cup diced cucumber I diced using a food processor
  • 1/2 cup sugar
  • 1/2 cup water
  • 1/2 cup honey

Instructions

Honey-Cucumber Syrup

  1. Add all of the ingredients into a saucepan and stir over low heat until the sugar dissolves and the honey is liquified.

  2. Allow the mixture to simmer for 4 minutes.

  3. Strain out the cucumber chunks (if desired) and let the syrup cool in the fridge.

Lemonade

  1. Squeeze the lemons to make 2 cups of juice (I used an electric juicer).

  2. Add juice and sugar into a saucepan over low heat and stir until the sugar is dissolved.

  3. Add the juice/sugar mixture to 4 cups of water and mix well. (Add more water if you like your lemonade less tart). 

  4. Add syrup to taste. (I added all of the syrup made by the recipe, about 3 tablespoons per cup). 

  5. Garnish with sliced cucumbers and mint and enjoy! 

 

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Dreams of Green + 7 Somethings

I am not a girl with a green thumb. My home is where potted plants come to die.

Dreams of Green

My sweet husband used to bring home flowers in small pots as a romantic gesture, and finally one day I had to ask him to stop. I couldn’t take the pressure of keeping them alive and the disappointment I’d feel when that plant inevitably kicked the can!

Despite my dreary history in horticulture, I’ve decided to take on a new project – indoor plants! I mean – with a baby due any day – there’s never been a better time to take on the task of sustaining plant life, right?!

Dreams of Green

I LOVE green… and this corner in the nursery has been begging for a natural pop of color.

I was going to just fill pots with fake plants, but they looked… well…. fake.

Dreams of GreenDreams of Green

I’ll be using Mary Lauren’s awesome guide to keeping plants alive. Here’s hoping that I can at least hold off the grim reaper until Everly’s due date!

Indoor plants are one of my “somethings“. Here are the rest!

Dreams of Green

Dreams of Green

2. Mike and I went to see The House this past weekend, and I somehow forgot that it was rated R (they only show the cleanest and funniest parts in the previews)! Thanks to the rating, I spent majority of the previews with my head buried in Mike’s shoulder, trying to block out the terrifying scenes of the HORROR movie previews! So if you’re looking for some laughs and hoping to catch this movie – beware – you may be getting a heavy dose of horror as well!

3. My hospital bag is packed and now there’s one little thing left to do – the push mix. We’ve got lots of relaxing/inspiring music stations on hand, but I feel like the actual delivery part of labor is going to call for something more intense. Is it weird that I’m considering Salt-N-Pepa’s Push It and Run the World by Beyonce? 😉

4. I love my letterboard. Like most people, I got one because I was so inspired by all of the hilarious quotes I saw being used. Part of me wonders if I’m clever enough to own one of these! Disclaimer: my funniest letter board quotes won’t be originals! You can see my latest inspirations here.

5. I suffer from Amazon Prime guilt. We use Prime WAY too often! It’s not uncommon for us to get multiple deliveries in a day and for there to be a stockpile of unbroken down boxes alongside our house. The Amazon delivery guy once tried bringing a package to our doorstep, before quickly realizing it was meant for our neighbors – force of habit I guess! I’d like to blame the steady delivery traffic on the fact that we have a baby coming and need lots of stuff, but the truth is that we’re just addicted to convenience. Can anyone else relate?!

6. Most of my wardrobe consists of stripes these daysI love the way they accentuate the baby bump. I’ve been living in this particularly comfortable dress from Target.

7. We’re squeezing in as many date nights as we can! The Orchard is our current new favorite place. It’s a little local gem, tucked away in a neighborhood off of Glendale Avenue. There are 3 restaurants on the historic property – a dinner place, a breakfast/lunch market, and an ice cream parlor. Yum! In the center of all the restaurants are picnic tables, lawn chairs, dangling lights, and even a splash pad for kids! Talk about the perfect trifecta!

Summers are full of favorite “somethings”! What are some of yours?

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What I Can’t Wait For

It’s now July –  my baby girl’s birthday month. Lately, the reality of her arrival has been hitting me in massive waves of excitement! There are so many things about bringing my little human home that I just can’t wait for!

What I Can't Wait For

I’m looking forward to the tangible things.

Like the smell and feel of her brand new baby skin!

And being able to hold and kiss her precious little baby hands and feet. (Does anyone else just lose it over adorable baby feet?!)

What I Can't Wait For

I can’t wait to see which features of me and which features of Mike she uniquely wears. I already know that I’ll marvel in amazement at how God knitted her together so perfectly.

And then there are the intangible things that I can’t wait for.

Like the instinctual ease of holding baby. (I was that teen that fearfully held newborns as if they were ticking time bombs)! I’m looking forward to those mama instincts, or in the very least, what I’ll learn in sick or swim fashion!

I’m looking forward to loving a completely new facet of my husband – Mike the dad. There are moments as we sit talking and dreaming about our little girl when this look of absolute tenderness comes over his face… and I just want to cry!

What I Can't Wait For

PHOTOGRAPHER

And most of all, I look forward to understanding God’s love in a deeply new and profound way. To know that the massive love I feel for my daughter can’t even compare to the everlasting and depthless love of God for me will be SO humbling!

I’ve been carrying our Everly June for almost 9 months now. In a way I feel like we’ve been planning a massive homecoming party for dear friend all this time. A friend who’ve we’ve never met, and yet somehow know so well. A little life who will change our lives forever.

We can’t wait to meet you Everly June! You homecoming party is ready for you. 🙂

What I Can't Wait For

PHOTOGRAPHER

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7 Things You Should Never Say to a Pregnant Woman

7 Things You Should Never Say to a Pregnant Woman

If you’ve ever been pregnant – you’ve been there. The moment people know that you’re expecting, your body suddenly becomes an acceptable topic of conversation.

And scrutiny.

And touching.

Don’t get me wrong! For the most part, I’ve loved the changes pregnancy has brought me and I’ll be the first to want to gush about how excited I am. BUT, occasionally over the past 8 months I’ve received some shockingly rude – and hilarious – comments.

I should preface this list by saying that I know that none of the people who made these comments were ill-intentioned, which is why I can laugh about them! So go ahead and laugh with me! 🙂

1.  Me: “I’m having a girl”. Store clerk: “Ah yes, girls steal all of their mom’s beauty.”

2.  Girl (as she compares me to another pregnant woman standing nearby): “You’re short, so the weight has to go everywhere.”

3.  My dermatologist: “Wow. When you were sitting, I thought you looked small… but now that you’re standing…”

4.  Guy: “When are you due?! You don’t look like you have much more room to grow!”

5.  (Before we knew our babe’s gender). Woman: “You’re having a girl. I can tell because you’re carrying the weight everywhere.”

6.  Fitness instructor: “How are you today, besides being SUPER pregnant?”

7.  Husband: “Sorry wifey. I finished off the ice-cream.”

Ah pregnancy – what a delightful season! Having a sense of humor is KEY!

How about you other mommies? Got any comments that top mine?

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